It is said, the teacher will appear when the student is ready.
Apparently, teachers can come in many forms, and I certainly was not expecting the arrival of my teacher that gray, chilly October morning when I received a rather unpleasant phone call from a friend who I held in very high esteem.
Upon saying “hello” I was met with a barrage of criticisms and what I felt were undeserved and unwarranted accusations about an event that had taken place earlier in the week. I could feel the angry energy coming through the phone which stunned me. For nearly 10 minutes, I said nothing, just listened as she unleashed what seemed like every transgression she had experienced in her life and directed them all at me. When she finished her storm of rage, I attempted with as much humble dignity and grace as I could summon to empathize and apologize for the damage “I” single-handedly had caused.
After finishing the call, I felt so humiliated that I curled up on the floor and sobbed. I could barely function for the rest of the day. This was not a proud moment for me. In fact, this incident brought on so much guilt, embarrassment, and shame that I could not even share the confusion and pain I was feeling with those closest to me or my own coach until months later. By that time, I had done quite a lot of my own self-reflection, growth, and healing, which gave me a different perspective on the situation. I began to understand how this woman might be feeling so I could empathize with her emotions, and see the hidden reason of why is was important for me to have this experience.
You see, it was a particularly stressful time in my life with the pressures of a job responsibilities, health issues (something I had never dealt with), and the pressure of overseeing a staff and the care of my mother who, at the time, had only a few months to live. To say I thought I could “do it all” is an understatement. I was worn out and had no self-awareness of my level of stress and anxiety.
It never once occurred to me to give myself permission to step out of the race for a bit so I could take care of the only me there is. Nope, I opted for being the Martyr on the verge of a mental and physical breakdown. It was absolutely ridiculous! I look back now and wonder, “who was I trying to be?” It was totally the opposite of who I desired or was meant to be.
Little did I understand at the time, it was exactly the motivation I needed to make a better decision about my life. I told myself “This is complete and utter nonsense! I have had enough! I am meant for so much more in this life.” Quite frankly, every single one of us deserves so much more than we believe and allow.
This was also the moment when the Universe heard me, loud and clear, and began setting things into motion that, months later, allowed me to step out of my corporate role to become a full-time life coach and mentor. This awareness also gave me the beautiful opportunity to care for my mom who was in the last several weeks of her life. Two gifts I will always cherish and will be grateful for.
Just when you think life is happening to you, you learn that life is really happening for you. This can only come into our awareness by being willing to open our minds and to consider other possibilities.
Though it was a tough lesson for me at the time, I am and will forever be grateful for how things unfolded. Today, I help others shift their perspectives and grow into who they are meant to be, which brings me so much joy and gratitude for pretty much everything I’ve experienced in life.
I share this story with you all in the hopes you will look at your life through a new lens to see there are limitless possibilities in the world for you and that person who may be bringing you the most grief right now, may indeed, be the teacher you need to help you see things differently.
Remember to give yourself and others grace before jumping into victimhood or blame over anything. We never know what’s going on in the life of someone else and when we open our hearts and eyes to the fact that it isn’t just about us, choosing to see each other as the gifts we are, we create a world of love, peace, and joy.
Who are the “teachers” in your life and what are they trying to tell you? Need help finding out? Schedule your free consultation with me today and together we can explore what’s possible for you.
The practice of meditation has been around since the dawn of time, which is kind of ironic since many forms of meditation move us beyond space and time—the quantum field where, as I understand it, time is merely an illusion. That’s kind of way out there so I’ll back up a bit for those who aren’t familiar with or who have never delved into the beautiful art of meditation.
Without going down the rabbit hole of where it all began for me, I was challenged by one of my early mentors to start my own practice of meditation. So, I did a little research to get a better understanding of what exactly I was supposed “to do” during my meditation time. The answer I received was that I needed to “do nothing.” Ok, well that didn’t sound very practical, but I went along with it for a while and before long, I learned how to sit still and listen. I started to see my life in a different way and slowly began to feel more in alignment with myself.
I wasn’t always consistent with my practice, but I learned that if I skipped my meditation for more than a couple of days, I would slip back into old habits and didn’t feel as optimistic as I did when I made meditation a priority.
Then I was introduced to the work of Dr. Joe Dispenza and have learned a great deal more about the power of meditation and how the brain is affected by practicing daily meditation. What’s even more interesting is that the heart wants in on the action and through specific types of meditation, the brain and heart get together and can actually create massive change in the lives of people individually and collectively. This is a very simplistic way of sharing the background of my practice, but I truly believe in its power and encourage you all to include meditation in your daily life, if you’re already not doing it.
Earlier in September, I had the opportunity to join over 140,000 people from 174 countries for the first Walk for the World event, a global effort to heal the world. By bringing people together in peace, love, kindness, and compassion, the hope is to eliminate fear, anger, judgment, hatred, and all the chaos happening in the world.
Earlier in the year I wrote about my life-long dream of making an impact in the world and by connecting with Dr. Joe and the others of this committed Walk for the World community, I am still filled with hope that by joining together, we can change the world. See A World Filled with Peace.
What do you think of when you hear someone say, “you sound like a broken record?”
A couple things come to mind for me: 1. The scratch in my Yellow Brick Road album that completely wrecked the song, Harmony; and 2. People who tell the same old story about their pathetic life over and over and over.
Recently, I was in a conversation with a friend where the broken record syndrome came into play, and I thought I’d write about it because many of us live with this form of self-sabotage and victimization in some way or another. By sharing I hope to inspire thoughtful reflection for how you show up in the world for yourself and others.
This person is very successful in some areas of life and in others, not so much. For instance, her business sense is remarkable, and she has a golden touch when it comes to investing and accumulating wealth. On the other hand, she struggles with her personal relationships and falls short in the areas of building and retaining loving relationships with her family and in certain social circles. She seems completely unaware of the advice she bestows on others, seldom follows that advice in her own life.
Isn’t it interesting how we see things in others,and fail to see the same things in ourselves?
She was going through her same old litany of complaints about how she receives no love and affection from her partner and that her kids disrespect and treat her unkindly. She “gives, gives, gives and feels completely unappreciated.” In another time, I would have jumped right on the bandwagon giving her all the co-dependent and heartfelt sympathy I could muster up. But this time, I chose to stay silent. I wondered, “why were we back at that old story again when we’ve rehashed it now for years?”
I’m not perfect by any stretch, and I have been known live in my old story of the past sounding like a broken record myself. And yes, we all get to vent from time to time, but when we choose to do nothing about the issue we’re venting about, it becomes annoying and sucks life out of everyone around us.
It’s one of the most common ways we hurt ourselves—by believing and repeating our own troubled stories hoping for sympathy or some other form of attention from anyone who will listen.
I can certainly relate! Me, the victim, lamenting about my horrible ex, or my lack of money, or this happened because of my parents, my boss, etc. I was repeating my sorry old stories over and over, focusing on everything on the outside and wondering why nothing ever changed.
“Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.”
~ Albert Einstein
When I decided to take a hard look in the mirror and fess up to the fact that all the emotions of lack, unworthiness, and shame were my own doing, I got busy and started seeking out as much help as I could. I read books, attended workshops, and eventually hired a coach to help me see where I was sabotaging my own life. It changed everything for me. I learned just how powerful having someone in my corner can be and I took inspired action to change.
I finally understood that my perception of how I was being treated by other people or my circumstances, in reality, was how I had been treating myself.
Ouch, that hurts!
Understanding that we don’t have control over what other people say and do is a major step in changing the way we choose to show up for ourselves and others. If you want people to treat you differently, treat yourself differently. How can we expect love and affection from others when we don’t give ourselves love and affection?
A skilled coach can help repair the Broken Record Syndrome. If you or someone you know could use some help rewriting their story, schedule a complimentary discovery call with me today.
The One Love Foundation has broken down the 10 Signs of Healthy and Unhealthy Relationships.
While healthy relationships bring out the best in us and make us feel good about ourselves, the unhealthy ones can cause us to feel alone, ashamed, unworthy, isolated, and possibly in danger.
None of us are perfect and none of us demonstrate healthy behaviors 100% of the time.
Of course, It all starts with loving yourself first. The way we treat others is like a mirror, a reflection of how we see and treat ourselves—this can be very humbling and harsh reality.
According to the One Love Foundation, we can all learn to love better by understanding the difference between healthy and unhealthy relationships. One Love has created a list to help people recognize these behaviors in themselves and in others they care about. As a supporter of the One Love Foundation, I’m sharing this list with all of you and hope you will take the time to check it out and share with others.
It’s important not to ignore the unhealthy signs and understand they can escalate into mental, emotional, or even physical abuse. Everyone deserves a healthy relationship.
To see a list of the 10 Signs of Healthy and Unhealthy Relationships,click here.
If you think you are in a dangerous situation, trust your gut and get help.
I’m leaving for Paris on Monday! I love Paris, it’s one of my favorite places in the whole wide world.
Love. Light. Energy.
Not to mention amazing food and historical artifacts everywhere you look—even the knobs on doors are beautiful. Fashion, buttery croissants and of course, champagne! For me it doesn’t get much better!
And contrary to what most of my American friends think, the French are lovely and can be very sweet, except when they’re not. C’est la vie!
People ask me why I love Paris so much and I can only say, “it feels like home”. Somehow, I’ve always known I was meant to be there.
No, I didn’t spend my youth mingling with the temperamental Parisians. Nor did I study in Paris during my college years like so many others. And my French is questionable at best. But I still love it all. I have always felt a sense of connection to the great City of Love and Light—even when I had no proof that traveling was meant for me.
Still, I was lured by the romance of the quaint cafes sprinkled in every neighborhood, the Anthem of Paris, La Vie En Rose, streaming through speakers in the little shops, and the magnificence of the Eiffel Tower, especially as her golden radiance lights up the night sky—a beacon for all the romantics of the world—me included.
Yet, just a few short years ago, my vision of carelessly roaming around the streets of Paris was just a dream. An experience meant for someone else; a fantasy kept tucked away on a forgotten shelf in my mind (or perhaps my heart). I could barely say “Paris” without a lump forming in my throat, especially when a friend would speak of their great adventure to my beloved city.
Today, I know we are all meant not only to dream our dreams, but to LIVE our dreams as well. Even the big audacious ones!
I know, I rattle on a lot with the benefits of having a life coach, but I know it works for anyone who is open to growth and willing to put in the effort. I always had a sense that I could have, be and do so much more in my life, but it was only when I started working with my first coach that I could even begin to see just how much I was capable of and that my big dreams could come true.
A coach once asked me, “How good are you willing to let your life get?” I had to think about this…was I willing to just dream about Paris and all the other experiences I desired or was I going to create a life where I could actually see my dreams to reality?
This will be my second trip to Paris in the past 9 months (I took myself to Paris to ring in 2023 earlier in the year). I’ll be meeting with my current life coach and a small group of women who are part of a global community I’m fortunate enough to belong to—each of us on our own life’s journey.
Together we support one another’s dreams, cheer each other on, dry each other’s tears, and celebrate life to the fullest. This is what I’ve discovered through coaching and why I became a coach. I love helping and supporting others in seeing how incredibly gifted they are and how to believe in themselves. And when someone lights up with surprise at seeing a situation differently or the new opportunities that mysteriously start appearing in their lives, it truly brings me joy. I want that for everyone.
Weirdly enough, I know Paris isn’t for everyone! But I must ask, what dreams have gone unfulfilled in your life? If you’re ready to rediscover what’s possible for you, I’d love to help. Call me or schedule a complimentary Life in Transition Assessment with me today. It’s more fun to have someone in your corner along the way!
