Gratitude Text

Think of someone who’s made a positive impact on your life recently. Send them a quick text to say thank you. It doesn’t have to be long—just a few words to let them know you appreciate them. You’ll brighten both their day and yours.

Taking care of yourself, both mentally and physically, is crucial as you navigate life transitions. You’re not alone, and there is a path forward, even if it doesn’t feel like it right now. If you know someone that could use a little boost of Self Care, please feel free to share this tip with them by hitting the button below.

As Thanksgiving draws near, the season can bring an emotional weight, especially when you’re navigating the ups and downs of divorce. In a season that often highlights togetherness and tradition, it can be hard to feel “at home” in the familiar rituals. But even in this time of transition, there is a gentle opportunity to reflect, heal, and discover peace in new and unexpected ways.

Here are some tips to help you approach Thanksgiving with a sense of intention, resilience, and even grace:

1. Allow Yourself to Feel Everything

Thanksgiving may stir up a blend of emotions—grief, nostalgia, relief, even gratitude. Whatever comes up, give yourself permission to feel it all without judgment. Take moments to reflect, to journal, or to talk with someone who understands. There’s no “right” way to feel and allowing these feelings to surface is part of your healing process.

2. Create New Traditions That Feel True to You

This holiday might not look the same as it once did, and that’s okay. See this as an invitation to create traditions that resonate with who you are right now. Host a Friendsgiving, volunteer for a cause that speaks to your heart, or start a simple gratitude practice. Focus on creating meaningful moments rather than recreating the past.

3. Lean on Your People

Holidays can be particularly isolating if you feel disconnected, so reach out to your support system. Share a meal with friends who uplift you, connect with family, or talk with a coach or therapist who understands this journey. You don’t have to walk through this alone, and sometimes even a simple conversation can lighten the emotional load.

4. Embrace Small Acts of Self-Care

Take time for little things that nurture you—whether it’s savoring your favorite dessert, taking a brisk walk through crisp fall leaves, or simply resting without an agenda. Small acts of self-care are powerful reminders that you are worthy of joy and care, even in the midst of challenges.

5. Redefine Gratitude in a Way That Feels Right

Gratitude doesn’t have to be a forced exercise; it can be as simple as noticing something that brings a sense of warmth or comfort. Maybe it’s the comfort of a cozy blanket, the way the afternoon light falls through the window, or the sound of laughter—even if it feels distant right now. Let gratitude be gentle and authentic to where you are.

6. Set Gentle Boundaries for Yourself

The pressure to make Thanksgiving “perfect” can feel overwhelming, so let yourself off the hook. Say no to gatherings or traditions that don’t bring you peace. Choose activities that truly nourish you and remember that setting boundaries is a form of self-respect and a way to protect your well-being.

7. Reflect on the Future You’re Creating

Take a moment to imagine the future you’re stepping into. What qualities do you want to bring forward? Who do you want to become? Divorce may feel like an ending, but it’s also a doorway to a new beginning, one that is full of possibilities. Holding space for this vision can bring a sense of hope, even if it’s just a spark.

8. Let Forgiveness Be Part of Your Journey—For Yourself and Others

This holiday season, see if there’s room for even a small measure of forgiveness, whether it’s toward yourself or someone else. Forgiveness isn’t about condoning hurtful behavior; it’s about freeing yourself from the weight of resentment. Offer yourself compassion for any past choices and remember that healing takes time.

9. Focus on the Present Moment

When the mind wanders to past memories or future uncertainties, bring yourself back to now. Thanksgiving doesn’t need to be perfect, and it doesn’t need to feel like past holidays. Today is just one day on your journey, a moment in your life’s unfolding. Be kind to yourself and remember that this day is one part of a much larger, evolving story.

Remember, this holiday is a single day within a much larger journey of growth, healing, and self-discovery. By choosing grace, honoring your needs, and focusing on what truly matters, you can bring a sense of peace and empowerment to this season of change.

Wishing you strength, resilience, and moments of quiet gratitude this Thanksgiving.

Love and Light,

Michele

If this Thanksgiving season feels like a tender balancing act between healing and hope, I’m here to walk with you. Together, we can uncover the strength and clarity to navigate this time with intention and grace. Schedule a free consultation with me today, and let’s begin creating a life that honors who you are and the future you’re stepping into.

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I was listening to a talk tonight when someone said, “who are you when you aren’t believing something is wrong with you?” And…Damn…That’s all. ~Cleo Wade

Whoa! When I read this quote by Cleo Wade, I felt like I’d been hit by a sharp draft that cuts right to the bone, piercing through any of those “I’m fine, really!” layers and reaching straight to the core. You know the feeling, right? That question stayed with me, whispering its way into all the moments where I’ve bent myself like a paperclip to fit into boxes that were clearly marked “not for me.”

I remember one time, years ago, being in a room filled with professionals at a networking event. There I was, in my carefully picked blazer, holding a wine glass a little too tightly, and all the while convincing myself that I could be just like them: polished, quiet, and neat. I’d walk around, smiling at strangers, having these surface-level conversations where I pretended to be fascinated by topics I cared nothing about. The whole time, though, I was suffocating under this image I’d decided I needed to project. I wanted to be seen as “put-together” and “proper” because I thought that was the ticket to belonging.

But deep down, I knew this wasn’t me. My real self was more colorful and raw—less interested in blending in and more curious about the deeper connections. The kind of conversations that feel like sharing a heartbeat, like when you look someone in the eye and let them see every beautifully flawed part of you. But there I was, showing up as this shadow of myself, because I was so afraid that just being “me” wasn’t enough. Worse, I believed that being “me” was something that actually needed fixing.

It took me a long time to realize that the only thing needing fixing was my belief that I had to be anything other than who I am. And when that belief started to crack, something extraordinary happened—I started showing up fully, unapologetically,and without feeling like I had to contort myself into any “should” or “must.”

When I let go of believing something was wrong with me, I began connecting with people in ways that made my heart expand. I no longer needed approval from others, and that’s when I truly started to belong—not to some version of me that fit in neatly, but to the person I actually am. The one who shows up, warts and all, because that’s real, that’s alive, and that’s enough.

So, who are you when you aren’t believing something’s wrong with you? It’s a big question, one that might unravel some of the old narratives you’ve clung to for far too long. And maybe, just maybe, it’ll remind you that you are already whole. You’re exactly enough, just as you are.

Love and Light,

Michele

If you’re ready to shift your perspective and open your heart to what’s possible, let’s talk. Schedule a free consultation with me, and together we can start creating the life you truly deserve.

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Sometimes, when we think of “red flags” in a marriage, we imagine clear, bold signals—like infidelity or explosive fights—that tell us something is wrong. But in reality, red flags aren’t always waving and obvious. Some are subtle, almost invisible, slipping into the day-to-day until, one day, we find ourselves wondering, “How did we get here?”

If you’re reading this, there might be a whisper inside of you already sensing that something isn’t quite right. Maybe it’s a low-level resentment that’s crept in, or an exhaustion that goes beyond physical tiredness. The truth is, relationships don’t always change overnight. It’s the slow, almost imperceptible shifts that can build up and impact our marriages over time.

One client of mine, let’s call her Laura, shared how she realized she had ignored the quiet signs for years. Her husband wasn’t unkind, nor was there any major betrayal to point to. But over time, she noticed she’d stopped sharing parts of herself with him, choosing silence over honesty to “keep the peace.” It wasn’t until she looked back that she realized those little choices—staying silent, sidestepping her own needs, and feeling like she was walking on eggshells—were red flags all along. She wasn’t stupid for ignoring them; she was simply hoping for the best, believing it would get better on its own.

Laura’s story is all too common. We don’t always recognize these subtle signs because they’re easy to write off as “normal” relationship struggles. Maybe we tell ourselves that everyone goes through this, or that we’re being dramatic, or that we’re the problem for wanting something different. But these tiny red flags matter. They matter because they often signal that something in the foundation of the relationship isn’t holding up under the weight of time and change.

So, what do these subtle red flags look like? Here are a few examples that are easy to miss but can have a powerful impact on a marriage over the years.

Withholding Your Feelings
Perhaps you’ve found yourself biting your tongue, feeling that sharing your true thoughts or needs will only lead to conflict or frustration. Over time, choosing silence over honesty chips away at the intimacy in a relationship. When you can’t safely share your thoughts, the relationship can start to feel more like a compromise than a partnership.

Resentment That You Can’t Quite Explain
Resentment has a sneaky way of creeping in under the radar, often when needs go unmet, or boundaries are ignored. Maybe you’re doing more of the heavy lifting at home, or you’re always the one adjusting to keep things harmonious. Even though there’s no outright conflict, this quiet resentment accumulates. It’s not always obvious, but it often leaves you feeling depleted and disconnected.

Constantly “Picking Your Battles”
There’s a wisdom in not sweating the small stuff. But if you find yourself “picking your battles” so much that you rarely address anything that bothers you, it’s worth taking a closer look. When one person is always accommodating, the relationship can lose balance. And truthfully, it’s another way of trying to “control” the situation for fear of tipping over the apple cart by speaking your truth.

Feeling Isolated or Like Your Partner Doesn’t Truly See You
If you’re feeling unseen or unheard in your marriage, it might be tempting to explain it away as the result of busy schedules or shifting priorities. But when that feeling of invisibility becomes a pattern, it’s often a sign that a meaningful connection has been lost. Feeling invisible in your relationship is a painful, subtle red flag that deserves attention.

An Ongoing Sense of Unhappiness, Even If You Can’t Quite Put Your Finger on Why
Some days, nothing feels particularly wrong, yet nothing feels right either. You’re not necessarily in crisis, but you’re not happy. That quiet discontent can be the hardest to identify, but over time, it chips away at the foundation of love and companionship.

If any of these resonate, know this:

you’re not foolish or wrong for ignoring them.

Many of us overlook these subtle signals because we hope things will improve, or we tell ourselves that this is just part of marriage. But ignoring these quiet red flags doesn’t make them go away. Over time, they can turn into deep-seated issues that make the relationship feel more like a weight than a source of support.

Addressing these subtle red flags doesn’t mean your marriage is doomed. In fact, recognizing them is the first step toward healing and growth. Whether that means working through things together or seeking outside support, bringing these unspoken issues to light can breathe new life into a relationship. This all requires a healthy sense of self-awareness and emotional intelligence.

So, if you’ve been sensing that something is off—even if you can’t fully articulate it—trust that feeling. Curiosity is often the first step toward positive change. Taking a closer look doesn’t mean you’re looking for faults; it means you’re committed to a relationship that supports and uplifts both of you.

I often say that you don’t have to have it all figured out on your own. Sometimes, having someone outside of the relationship can offer a perspective that makes things clearer. My role is to guide, to listen, and to help you explore what’s really going on, not just for the relationship, but for you. Because every choice you make should bring you closer to the heart of who you are and what you’re meant for.

Love and Light,

Michele

If you’re feeling that quiet pull to explore what’s beneath the surface, you don’t have to face it alone. Let’s work together to bring clarity and empowerment to your journey. Schedule a complimentary consultation with me today and take the first step toward a healthier, more fulfilling path forward.

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There was a time in my life when I was the Queen of Blame. I mean, if someone hurt me, they were absolutely going to hear about it. I’d replay every wrong, every sharp word, and make sure that person (and anyone else who would listen) knew just how much damage they’d caused. I felt justified in my anger—after all, they were the ones who shot the arrow, right?

And then, one day, I stumbled upon this quote by Pema Chödrön:

“If someone comes along and shoots an arrow into your heart, it’s fruitless to stand there and yell at the person. It would be much better to turn your attention to the fact that there’s an arrow in your heart.”

That quote made me feel a little indignant, after all, what does a Buddhist Nun know about being hurt? Upon learning more about the life this woman had experienced, I had to admit, she had a point. Here I was, holding on so tightly to all the ways people had hurt me, standing there shouting about the arrows without even acknowledging the fact that I was the one still standing there, wounded. My energy was all focused on them—the shooters—rather than where it really needed to be. On the fact that I had an arrow in my heart and was doing absolutely nothing to heal it.

The truth is, it’s easier to play the victim. There’s a certain comfort in it because when you’re the victim, you don’t have to take responsibility for anything. It’s always someone else’s fault. But living in that space was also exhausting, draining, and kept me stuck in a cycle of pain.

It took me a while—longer than I’d like to admit—but eventually, I began to realize that pointing fingers wasn’t getting me anywhere. I was still in pain, and my heart was still wounded. So, I made a bold decision to change. Instead of standing there waiting for someone else to fix me, I started looking at the arrow. Not just the surface wound, but deeper—at the old stories I was telling myself, the fears I hadn’t addressed, the parts of myself I didn’t want to face.

Taking responsibility for my healing didn’t happen overnight. It was a process (and still is), messy at times, and filled with moments where I wanted to go back to blaming others. But slowly, I began to see that I had more control over my life than I thought. I could choose to keep living in pain, or I could take that arrow out and start healing. This shift also helped me not let new arrows pierce so deeply anymore. It was about recognizing my own patterns, and taking responsibility for my reactions, my choices, and ultimately, my future.

This transformation allowed me to move through the world with more grace and resilience. And it’s made room in my heart for so much more than I ever thought possible—more love, more joy, and yes, even forgiveness.

So, as we head into the end of the year—a time when we reflect on where we’ve been and where we want to go—I invite you to consider the arrows you’re still carrying. Maybe it’s time to stop shouting at the people who’ve hurt you and start focusing on your own healing.

Love and Light,

Michele

If you’re ready to shift your perspective and open your heart to what’s possible, let’s talk. Schedule a free consultation with me, and together we can start creating the life you truly deserve.

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Forgiveness. Just saying the word can stir up all kinds of feelings. For many people going through divorce, forgiveness feels like the last thing on the list—if it’s even on the list at all. After all, if your ex was a total nightmare, why on earth would you forgive them? Isn’t that letting them off the hook? It can feel like they’re getting away with something, while you’re left with all the pieces to pick up. But here’s the thing: forgiveness isn’t about them. It’s about you—and the freedom you can find by letting go of the ugly story that’s been weighing you down. 

Renee came to me in the thick of her divorce, full of anger and resentment. Her ex had done some pretty awful things (we’re talking betrayal, manipulation, the works), and she was not interested in the idea of forgiveness. She felt stuck, cycling through the same old thoughts, replaying the “how could he?” moments over and over in her mind. 

We talked about how holding onto that anger was affecting her—not just emotionally but physically too. She had trouble sleeping, felt anxious all the time, and was drained from carrying that bitterness everywhere she went. But whenever I brought up forgiveness, she recoiled. In her mind, forgiveness meant giving him a free pass for all the damage he’d caused. 

But forgiveness isn’t about excusing someone else’s behavior or pretending the hurt didn’t happen. It’s about freeing yourself from the grip of the story. When we make someone else the source of who we are—when we say, “He ruined me” or “She made me feel worthless”—we lose our own power. We hand over control of our emotions, our self-worth, and our happiness to someone else. And in Renee’s case, her ex wasn’t just a part of her past; he had become the main character in her story, even though the marriage was over. 

I asked Renee “What if forgiveness wasn’t about him at all? What if it was about you finding peace and freedom, so you could let go of the role of the victim and reclaim your power?” 

Joan began to realize that she wasn’t letting him off the hook—she was letting herself off the hook. She was letting go of the ugliness of the story, the constant feeling of victimhood, and the weight of blame she’d been carrying. It wasn’t an overnight process. But over time, Renee began to see forgiveness as an act of self-care, a way to put herself and her future first. 

My Story of Forgiveness 

I’ll admit it—this lesson didn’t come easy for me either. I’ve been through two divorces, and there were times when forgiveness felt like a foreign language. I was so caught up in being the “good wife,” always putting everyone else’s needs ahead of mine, that I lost myself. I became a classic people pleaser—doing everything I could to avoid conflict, keep the peace, and make sure everyone else was happy. Sound familiar? 

I blamed my exes for a long time. I fell into the trap of thinking; they did this to me. I had a whole script of “if only’s—if only they had been more supportive, if only they had listened to me, if only they had been different, I would have been fine. But the truth? I wasn’t fine because I had lost sight of who I was. I had put everyone else’s needs ahead of my own for so long that I had no idea what my needs even were anymore.  Sound familiar? 

By working with my coach, I learned I had to forgive myself. That was the real kicker. I had to let go of the guilt I carried for allowing myself to fall into trying to fit into someone else’s box, for being a people pleaser, for not standing up for myself sooner. I had to forgive myself for contributing to the situation, for not knowing better at the time, and for the choices I had made along the way. 

I realized that I wasn’t a victim of my circumstances—I was a participant. It was a tough pill to swallow, but it was also one of the most liberating things I’ve ever done. I had to stop blaming my exes for my unhappiness and start taking responsibility for my own healing. And when I did that, when I let go of the old patterns and allowed myself to forgive (both them and myself), I found something I hadn’t felt in a long time—freedom. 

Forgiveness is Freedom 

While it doesn’t change the past, when we let go of resentment, we create space for something better—something kinder, more loving, more aligned with who we truly are and what we’re meant for. And that’s where the magic happens. You don’t have to carry that heavy baggage of anger, hurt, or disappointment into the next chapter of your life. 

If you’re holding on to anger, bitterness, or hurt—whether it’s toward your ex or even yourself—ask yourself this: What would it feel like to let go? What would it feel like to release the story and step into a new version of yourself, one that’s no longer defined by what went wrong, but by what’s possible moving forward? 

Love and Light,

Michele

If you’re ready to discover your freedom and don’t know where to start,

schedule a consultation with me today.

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