Write a Letter to Your Younger Self

Write a Letter to Your Younger Self

Write a Letter to Your Younger Self

Write a Letter to Your Younger Self – Writing a letter to your younger self is a fun personal growth activity. It really gives you the opportunity to reflect on your life, and a lovely way to stay mindful and create awareness about what’s important in life.

Taking care of yourself, both mentally and physically, is crucial as you navigate life transitions. You’re not alone, and there is a path forward, even if it doesn’t feel like it right now. If you know someone that could use a little boost of Self Care, please feel free to share this tip with them by hitting the button below.

 

NO GOING BACK

NO GOING BACK


“You can’t go back to how things were. How you thought they were. All you really have is…now.”

― Jay Asher


A while back while talking to a friend, I was sharing some sentimental feelings regarding what I missed about the experience of a relationship I had completed several months earlier.

…the fun things we’d done together…

…the companionship…

…the dinners and laughter shared during those “awesome” moments.

Then she said, “Well, you can always go back.”

And I responded, “No, no, I am unavailable to go BACK to anything in my life.”

While not my focal point, I also remembered the feelings of loneliness, sadness, and uncertainty about where either of us stood in the relationship.

For me the only path forward was one of expansion and growth.

Going backward in any area of life once you’ve expanded and grown beyond where you once were is nearly impossible.

It’s like trying to push toothpaste back into the tube after it’s been squeezed out. Once it’s out, it’s onto its purpose—there’s no going back without making a big mess.

Though I can feel sentimental about the memories of my past, I know in my heart there’s so much more out there for me.

The same is true for you!

If you spend your time and energy in the past, you never have the delightful experience of the present moment. And if you’re not living in the present, where are you?

Creating a future from the present is filled with creativity and so much more fun!

When the dynamics of relationships, careers, financial circumstances change, it doesn’t mean life is over, it just means it’s time to see what else is possible for you.

I’m not saying every step of the way will be easy, but letting things unfold as they’re meant to be almost always leads to something you never expected in the past.

If you need someone to take that step forward with, schedule a free consultation with me and together we’ll explore what’s possible for you!

Love and Light,

Michèle

Divorce Gifts Can Change Your Life

Divorce Gifts Can Change Your Life

Here at Getting to the Heart, I’m not an advocate for divorce, I just happen to work with many people who are either going through or have gone through a one. Having been through two of my own divorces, I understand how incredibly upsetting the process can be. The legal system can seem daunting and unfair, and the emotional turmoil can spur on even the meekest among us to do and say things that are totally out of character for us.

I’m also not a big fan of negativity in general, but let’s face it, if you’re going through a divorce, it can feel like someone has sucked the life out of you (and usually that someone is your ex) and not surprisingly, you really want to blow off some steam or hit something!

Before going out and keying his new Mercedes, throwing all her clothes in a pile and burning them in the front yard, or making a violent scene at your kid’s soccer game, think about how you might feel afterward. I don’t mean while in the act or directly afterward; I mean when the police show up on your doorstep with a warrant for your arrest or you see yourself plastered all over social media in a video displaying your extremely bad behavior.

If you are going through a divorce and you’re finding it difficult to keep your emotions in check, consider alternative remedies to ease you back into some sort of balance.

  1. A Punching Bag – a friend of mine recently installed one on her back porch and takes her frustrations out on one every morning after coffee. She tells me it’s a game-changer!
  2. Creativity Cure – I turned to painting during my last divorce, but many people find coloring books specifically designs with frustration management in mind.
  3. Physical Activity – Get outside and walk or run or ride your bike with serious intention…and leave your earbuds at home so you’re not tempted to listen to music that pulls you backward into the abyss of a woman scorned.
  4. Amp up your self-care – Take yourself to a spa, get a massage or buy yourself a beautiful bouquet to brighten up your spirits.
  5. Dammit Doll – This one is relatively new to me but truly brilliant! If you can’t laugh and find some relief with this one, you might consider a serious reset before going out in public
  6. Divorce Gift – You can find an array of funny divorce gifts for yourself or someone you know (some not so tasteful) on Etsy.
  7. Volunteer Your Time – You don’t need to spend money to find alternative ways of redirecting your emotions. You can find dozens of volunteer opportunities in your community reminding yourself there’s more to life than your current situation.
  8. Vacation – Get out of town, even if just overnight at a hotel or Airbnb in the next town over. Taking yourself out of your environment can provide a different perspective on things…I suggest bringing a scented candle, a good book, a funny movie, popcorn, chocolate and champagne or whatever lights your fire!

Most importantly, remind yourself of who you want to be through this divorce and do whatever it takes to become that version of yourself. You’ll save so much emotional energy and possibly money by taking serious measures to manage your emotions during your divorce.

Need a little extra help? Call me today or schedule a free consultation
and together we’ll explore what’s next for you.

Love and Light,

Michèle

 

 

 

Defending Your Excuses Won’t Bring You Happiness!

Defending Your Excuses Won’t Bring You Happiness!

Ah, the art of excuse-making. If there were an Olympic event for it, many of us would be gold medalists. We craft our reasons, shape them into unassailable truths, and guard them as if our very lives depended on it. Excuses are like a cozy blanket on a cold day. They keep us safe from the harsh realities of potential failure, judgment, or disappointment. They also serve as a convenient shield against the unknown. But as comforting as they are, excuses also keep us stuck, preventing us from reaching our true potential.

The Comfort of Excuses

We’ve all done it. “I don’t have time,” “I’m too old,” “I’m not smart enough,” “That’s just the way I am.” These excuses feel so real and valid that we don’t even question them. Yet, these same excuses are the barriers that keep us from achieving our dreams and expanding our potential. They are the stories we tell ourselves to justify staying in our comfort zones, avoiding the discomfort of growth and change.


Albert Einstein famously said, “Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.” Yet, how often do we find ourselves stuck in the same patterns, hoping that circumstances will magically change while we remain the same? “


The Fear of Failure

One of the most pervasive excuses is the fear of failure. “What if I try and fail?” This fear keeps us from taking risks and pursuing our true passions. It convinces us that it’s safer to stay where we are, even if we’re unhappy, rather than risk the possibility of failure. But the truth is, failure is not the end—it’s a step on the road to success. Every successful person has failed numerous times. They don’t let failure define them; they let it teach them and propel them forward.

The Blame Game

Another common excuse is blaming others for our circumstances. “If only my partner were more supportive,” “If my boss would recognize my potential,” “If my friends were more encouraging.” It’s easy to fall into the trap of believing that our happiness and success depend on others changing. But this mindset strips us of our power and places our destiny in someone else’s hands. Personal responsibility means taking ownership of our lives and choices. It means recognizing that while we can’t control others, we can control our reactions and decisions.

The Myth of Perfection

Perfectionism is another sneaky excuse that keeps us from moving forward. “I’ll start when I’m ready,” “I need more training,” “I have to get everything perfect first.” This excuse paralyzes us, keeping us from taking action. The reality is, there will never be a perfect time, and we will never be perfectly ready. Growth happens when we step out despite our imperfections and learn along the way.

Shifting Perspectives

To break free from the cycle of excuses, we must shift our perspectives. Instead of seeing challenges as threats, we can view them as opportunities for growth. Instead of waiting for others to change, we can focus on what we can change within ourselves. Instead of fearing failure, we can embrace it as a necessary part of the journey toward success.

Conclusion: From Excuses to Empowerment

Defending our excuses is natural, but it’s also limiting. By recognizing and challenging these excuses, we can open ourselves up to new possibilities and growth. It’s not always easy—trust me, I’ve been there—but it’s worth it. So, the next time you catch yourself defending an excuse, take a moment to ask, “What if?” What if you could achieve that dream? What if you could overcome that fear? What if you could become the person you’ve always wanted to be?

Remember, life is too short to be spent hiding behind excuses. Embrace the challenge, laugh at the missteps, and keep pushing forward. After all, the only thing standing between you and your dreams is the story you’re telling yourself. Make it a good one.

Schedule a free consultation with me today and together we’ll explore
how to go from “Why me?” to “Why not me?”

Feel free to share this with your colleagues and friends. Let’s keep each other inspired and motivated to break free from our excuses and live the lives we truly desire.

Love and Light,

Michèle

 

 

It’s Time for a New Agreement!

It’s Time for a New Agreement!

Before I even knew I was embarking on a journey of self-discovery and reinvention, I read a little book called The Four Agreements that made a significant impact on the trajectory of my life. I highly recommend this transformative gem to anyone who hasn’t yet been enlightened by the principles contained within its covers. I just finished reading again and, as with the first reading, came away with several nuggets of valuable insight.

I was reminded of the thousands of unwritten and unspoken agreements we have made throughout our lives—to ourselves as well to others—most of which are based on something we’ve either been taught, assumptions or fabrications we’ve made up on our own.

Where do these agreements come from?

Parents, siblings, teachers, bosses, friends and just about anyone else we listen to can plant these seeds that often grow into one of these unspoken agreements that frequently become beliefs.

And once our beliefs are set, we proceed through life as if it is our truth. The Four Agreements author, Don Meguel Ruiz, refers to this surrendering to our beliefs process as “the domestication of humans” where we learn how to live without questioning the source.

The fact is that many, if not most, of these beliefs are rather useless and can be detrimental to our growth, expansion, and the ability to consider what else might be going on here.

The Sowers of said seeds didn’t necessarily intend to contaminate our minds. Afterall, they were only doing what they, too, had learned along the journey of their own domestication.

What agreements do you have in place keeping you

from creating the life you desire?

Whether you are facing a major life transition, a divorce, or simply want more in life than what you’re experiencing, you can change.

It all starts with investigating the uninvestigated beliefs and perceptions, and asking yourself, “is what I believe TRUE for me?” “If not, How do I make that old agreement null and void and create a new agreement?

Anyone can do this, it may not be easy,

but it is possible.

If you’re ready to change some agreements in your life and could use some help, schedule a free consultation with me today and together we’ll explore what’s possible for you.

Love and Light,

Michèle 

 

Narcissist

Narcissist

I knew something was wrong, but I didn’t want to let myself accept it.

I had already been married and divorced once before and couldn’t believe I had let it happy again.

I was a strong, confident, accomplished woman…I didn’t think things like this could happen to me!

The man I married had swept me off my feet in the early days of courting, with flowers, special weekends away, offering fatherly attention to my daughter, safety for me, and seemed supportive of my career, had become rather dominating and excessively controlling…to the point that many people expressed their concern for my well-being.

Later I learned his behavior fell directly into the category of a Narcissist. I knew nothing about such things back then.

Make no mistake, controlling behaviors, along with emotional and/or financial abuse in a relationship or marriage do NOT equate to love.

If you can relate and are ready to explore your options, I can help.

Trust your gut and schedule a free and confidential consultation with me today. Together we’ll explore what level of support you might need as you navigate what’s next for you.

Love and Light,

Michèle