by micheleheffron | Feb 1, 2024 | divorce, family, marriage, Reflection, Relationship Advice
I’ve heard people ask, “Why do we need an entire DAY, let alone an entire MONTH dedicated to Love?”
I guess my response is “Why not?”
How could highlighting such a Universal word be harmful? I mean, as it is don’t we see enough hate, pain, anxiety, loss, and loneliness in the world? What could possibly be the harm in expressing heartfelt love to those who we care about as well as those we don’t?
I know, it’s complicated and I totally understand how brutally lonely life can be when Valentine’s Day rolls around and you’re home alone with a Cup ‘O Noodles and Netflix for the 5th year in a row. Or you’re stuck in a marriage or relationship where there’s been no sign of romance or real Love for many years; or you’re feeling stuck in an abusive situation wondering if the nightmare will ever end. These situations can be heavy and potentially serious.
What I’m talking about is what each of us can do in our own lives to foster Love. Most of the time (if not 100% of the time) it all starts with learning to Love yourself first. It’s one of the most important virtues most people never take the time to learn or apply in their own lives. Why? Because most of us feel uncomfortable, awkward, and certainly not in Love with the person staring back at us when we’re looking in the mirror. Lack of Self-Love can lead to a tapestry of feelings and emotions, many of which cause whatever life looks like for you today.
During the month of February, I’ll be focusing more of my messaging around Love and how, by fostering Love in our lives, the ripples of our thoughts and actions can totally change the way we see ourselves as well as how we see others. And the beauty of a ripple is that it spreads out and touches places and people we may never know. How cool is that?
This idea may not be the answer to everyone’s problems but it’s a step in the right direction; and spreading Love doesn’t cost anything except perhaps, choosing to see the world around us differently. The world needs more Love and each one of us can help create more of it. Everyone can contribute to spreading Love.
A friend of mine recently posted that February is also Random Acts of Kindness Month. What a great way to give this whole Love thing a try. Every day, commit doing something kind for yourself or for someone else, even if you don’t know them and they don’t know you did it. I find just smiling at someone wearing a frown often causes them to smile back, or at least lightens their day a little. You never know how your kindness might make a difference for someone else.
And when Valentine’s Day arrives and you’re not out with a sweetheart or doing something fun, get yourself some good chocolate and pour yourself a glass of champagne (or whatever makes you happy) and send a little Love out into the Universe and just see what goodness comes back to you.
If you are ready to make some lasting changes in your capacity for Self-Love, I’d Love to help. Schedule your complimentary consultation with me today and together we can explore what support you may need to see how Self-Love can change your life.
Receive your copy of the 10 Signs of Healthy and Unhealthy Relationships click here.
Michèle Heffron is a certified life, relationship & divorce coach whose mission is to empower women through life transitions to discover their purpose and create the life they desire. Her work stems from her life experiences and the lessons learned while paving her own path to empowerment. Michèle lives in Bellevue, Washington and serves clients in all 50 states.
Learn more about Michèle: www.micheleheffron.com;
Schedule your free consultation with Michèle calendly.com/michele_heffron
Listen to her podcast: Getting to the Heart on Spotify or wherever you get your podcasts.
Love & Light,
Michele
by micheleheffron | Jan 24, 2024 | divorce, family, marriage, Reflection, Relationship Advice
Before becoming a life coach, I served on the leadership team of a national nonprofit organization whose mission is to end domestic violence by educating people about the difference between healthy and unhealthy relationships. Until then, I had never really given much thought to what a healthy relationship looked like or felt like. I’ve learned a lot over the years and now understand more about what goes into making a relationship a healthy one.
Today, one of my priorities in coaching is to help people see the difference between healthy and unhealthy relationships and to identify what’s working or not working in their own relationships.
Relationships are foundational in our lives starting from the time we’re born. We have relationships with our mothers, fathers, siblings, friends, co-workers, and romantic partners. The quality of our relationships can dramatically impact the quality of our lives.
A couple, building a strong and lasting relationship requires effort, understanding, and commitment from both partners. While every relationship is unique, there are certain key indicators that can help determine its health and longevity. In today’s message, we will explore the 10 signs of a healthy relationship, providing a roadmap for couples to navigate the complexities of love and connection.
- Comfortable Pace:
One of the first signs of a healthy relationship is a comfortable pace of progression. Both partners feel at ease with the speed at which the relationship is developing, whether it’s taking things slow or moving more quickly. Communication about the pace is essential, ensuring that both individuals feel respected and understood in their desire for emotional and physical intimacy.
- Trust:
Trust is the cornerstone of any successful relationship. It involves confidence in your partner’s integrity, reliability, and intentions. A healthy relationship fosters an environment where trust can flourish, allowing both partners to feel secure and emotionally connected.
- Honesty:
Open and honest communication is vital for the health of a relationship. Partners should feel comfortable sharing their thoughts, feelings, and concerns without fear of judgment. Honest communication builds a foundation of trust and helps prevent misunderstandings that can lead to conflict.
- Independence:
While being in a relationship is about sharing your life with someone, it’s equally important to maintain individual identities and interests. Healthy relationships allow for independence, where both partners can pursue their passions and personal growth without feeling stifled.
- Respect:
Respect is a two-way street in a healthy relationship. It involves valuing each other’s opinions, boundaries, and autonomy. Mutual respect lays the groundwork for a strong connection and ensures that both partners feel appreciated and supported.
- Equality:
A healthy relationship thrives on equality. Both partners contribute to decision-making, responsibilities, and emotional support. Equality fosters a sense of partnership, where neither individual feels superior or inferior, creating a balanced and harmonious dynamic.
- Kindness:
Kindness is the glue that holds a relationship together during challenging times. Small gestures of kindness, empathy, and understanding contribute to a positive and nurturing environment. Acts of kindness strengthen the emotional bond between partners and create a culture of love and support.
- Fun:
Laughter and shared enjoyment are crucial components of a healthy relationship. Partners should find joy in spending time together, creating memories, and engaging in activities that bring happiness. Fun and playfulness contribute to a positive atmosphere and help to sustain a vibrant connection.
- Healthy Conflict:
Conflict is inevitable in any relationship, but how it is managed can make all the difference. Healthy conflict involves constructive communication, active listening, and a commitment to finding solutions. Resolving disagreements in a respectful manner strengthens the relationship and enhances understanding between partners.
- Taking Responsibility:
In a healthy relationship, both partners take responsibility for their actions and contribute to the overall well-being of the partnership. This involves acknowledging mistakes, apologizing when necessary, and working together to find resolutions. Taking responsibility fosters accountability and promotes a sense of maturity within the relationship.
A healthy relationship is a continuous journey of growth, understanding, and love. By recognizing and nurturing these 10 signs—comfortable pace, trust, honesty, independence, respect, equality, kindness, fun, healthy conflict, and taking responsibility—couples can build a foundation that withstands the test of time. Investing in these aspects of a relationship not only strengthens the bond between partners but also creates a fulfilling and enduring connection that stands strong against the challenges that life may bring.
Receive your copy of the 10 Signs of Healthy and Unhealthy Relationships click here.
Michèle Heffron is a certified life, relationship & divorce coach whose mission is to empower women through life transitions to discover their purpose and create the life they desire. Her work stems from her life experiences and the lessons learned while paving her own path to empowerment. Michèle lives in Bellevue, Washington and serves clients in all 50 states.
Learn more about Michèle: www.micheleheffron.com;
Schedule your free consultation with Michèle calendly.com/michele_heffron
Listen to her podcast: Getting to the Heart on Spotify or wherever you get your podcasts.
Love & Light,
Michele
by micheleheffron | Jan 17, 2024 | Reflection, Relationship Advice
The truth is that as the calendar turns, January has earned the unofficial title of Divorce Month. As individuals assess their lives and make resolutions for the upcoming year, they may find themselves evaluating their relationships as well. Legal experts often attribute this phenomenon to one thing: the holidays.
People are hesitant to go down the divorce road during the festive holiday season. For couples, particularly those with children, the thought of ending a marriage may have been lingering before the holidays, but choose to hold off, opting to stay married through the end of the year.
Today, we’ll take a deeper dive into why January seems to be the month when more couples decide to call it quits.
- Reflection and Resolutions:
January is a month associated with reflection and goal setting. As individuals assess their lives and make resolutions for the upcoming year, they may find themselves evaluating their relationships as well. The pressure to make positive changes in one’s life can lead individuals to reassess their marriages and decide that a divorce is the necessary step to achieve personal happiness and fulfillment.
- Post-Holiday Reality Check:
The holiday season, often associated with joy and togetherness, can also be a time of heightened stress and tension. Couples may find themselves facing unresolved issues or experiencing disappointment when reality doesn’t match the idealized holiday expectations. After the festivities conclude and normal routines resume, individuals may be more inclined to confront lingering problems and make the difficult decision to end their marriages.
The financial strain of holiday expenses can be a significant source of stress for couples. From gift-giving to travel and hosting family gatherings, the financial burden can take a toll on a marriage. As the new year begins and bills start piling up, couples may find themselves grappling with financial disagreements, leading some to consider divorce as a way to alleviate financial strain.
- Legal and Emotional Preparation:
For those contemplating divorce, January may be a strategic time to initiate the process. Individuals often use the preceding months to gather financial documents, consult with attorneys, divorce experts, and emotionally prepare for the significant life change. With the new year symbolizing a fresh start, January can be seen as an opportune time to officially begin the divorce proceedings.
Some couples may choose to delay their decision to divorce during the holiday season, especially if children are involved. They might prioritize maintaining a semblance of normalcy during festivities. Once the holidays are over, couples may feel more compelled to address their issues and pursue divorce, contributing to the January spike.
As we jump into January with our resolutions and hopes for a better year, it’s also a month where many relationships go south. The mix of “new year, new me” mentality, post-holiday reality checks, money stress, emotional preparation, and avoiding reality all play into the January breakup phenomena.
The decision to pursue divorce is deeply personal, no matter what time of year, and if it’s time for you or someone you know, get help. Divorce is hard all around and there’s no one-size-fits-all approach. By seeking emotional and legal assistance early in the process from coaches, therapists, and professionals, you’ll navigate the rocky waters of divorce and on with your life with more clarity, confidence, and resilience ready for your new beginning. Schedule your complimentary discovery call to see what support you may need as you embark on your road to divorce.
Love & Light,
Michele
by micheleheffron | Jan 11, 2024 | Reflection, Relationship Advice
I know, it’s not exactly the most cheerful way to ring in the new year.
The truth is that as the calendar turns, January has earned the unofficial title of Divorce Month. As individuals assess their lives and make resolutions for the upcoming year, they may find themselves evaluating their relationships as well. Legal experts often attribute this phenomenon to one thing: the holidays. People are hesitant to go down the divorce road during the festive holiday season. For couples, particularly those with children, the thought of ending a marriage may have been lingering before the holidays, but choose to hold off, opting to stay married through the end of the year.
Today, we’ll take a deeper dive into why January seems to be the month when more couples decide to call it quits.
- Reflection and Resolutions:
January is a month associated with reflection and goal setting. As individuals assess their lives and make resolutions for the upcoming year, they may find themselves evaluating their relationships as well. The pressure to make positive changes in one’s life can lead individuals to reassess their marriages and decide that a divorce is the necessary step to achieve personal happiness and fulfillment.
- Post-Holiday Reality Check:
The holiday season, often associated with joy and togetherness, can also be a time of heightened stress and tension. Couples may find themselves facing unresolved issues or experiencing disappointment when reality doesn’t match the idealized holiday expectations. After the festivities conclude and normal routines resume, individuals may be more inclined to confront lingering problems and make the difficult decision to end their marriages.
- Financial Pressures:
The financial strain of holiday expenses can be a significant source of stress for couples. From gift-giving to travel and hosting family gatherings, the financial burden can take a toll on a marriage. As the new year begins and bills start piling up, couples may find themselves grappling with financial disagreements, leading some to consider divorce as a way to alleviate financial strain.
- Legal and Emotional Preparation:
For those contemplating divorce, January may be a strategic time to initiate the process. Individuals often use the preceding months to gather financial documents, consult with attorneys, divorce experts, and emotionally prepare for the significant life change. With the new year symbolizing a fresh start, January can be seen as an opportune time to officially begin the divorce proceedings.
- Delayed Decision-Making:
Some couples may choose to delay their decision to divorce during the holiday season, especially if children are involved. They might prioritize maintaining a semblance of normalcy during festivities. Once the holidays are over, couples may feel more compelled to address their issues and pursue divorce, contributing to the January spike.
As we jump into January with our resolutions and hopes for a better year, it’s also a month where many relationships go south. The mix of “new year, new me” mentality, post-holiday reality checks, money stress, emotional preparation, and avoiding reality all play into the January breakup phenomena.
The decision to pursue divorce is deeply personal, no matter what time of year, and if it’s time for you or someone you know, get help. Divorce is hard all around and there’s no one-size-fits-all approach. By seeking emotional and legal assistance early in the process from coaches, therapists, and professionals, you’ll navigate the rocky waters of divorce and on with your life with more clarity, confidence, and resilience ready for your new beginning. Schedule your complimentary discovery call to see what support you may need as you embark on your road to divorce.
Love & Light,
Michele
by micheleheffron | Dec 27, 2023 | Reflection, Relationship Advice
As the final pages of the calendar turn, it’s natural to find ourselves in a reflective state, contemplating the journey of the past year and pondering the path that lies ahead. The canvas of time, painted with experiences both vivid and muted, has prompted me to pause and acknowledge the tapestry of my life.
The past year, another chapter in the book of my existence, has been a complex interplay of triumphs and tribulations. I have found it essential to sift through the mosaic of memories, appreciating the hues that brought joy and acknowledging the shadows that taught us resilience and opened me up to receiving inspiration and love.
In these moments of reflection, I find the power to distill wisdom from my experiences; and I ask myself, “what worked? What didn’t? What lessons can I carry forward into the uncharted territory of the coming year?” These questions have become signposts on my journey of self-discovery and growth.
Amidst the unpredictable currents of life, the act of setting intentions for the year ahead has served as a compass, and when I pay attention and heed the signs, I find they guide me toward the destination I envision. It’s not about resolutions that fade like fleeting fireworks but rather a deliberate commitment to growth, balance, and well-being.
Consider the canvas of your life as a blank page awaiting the strokes of purpose and direction. What aspirations do you harbor? What values will guide your decisions? Reflect on the seeds of potential within you and nurture them into flourishing goals.
Perhaps it’s a commitment to personal well-being – a healthier lifestyle, mindfulness practices, or simply taking the time to breathe deeply amid life’s hustles. Or maybe it’s professional aspirations – acquiring new skills, chasing career milestones, or cultivating a more balanced work-life dynamic. Possibly, it’s time to complete and tie up the loose ends of a relationship or unhappy marriage and move in the direction of finding your purpose in life.
As you pen down your goals, be mindful of their authenticity. Goals that resonate with your core values are more likely to withstand the test of time and challenges. Each goal becomes a milestone, marking your progress on the journey toward a more fulfilling life.
In the quiet space between the past and the future, take a moment to acknowledge the strength that carried you through the past year. Celebrate the small victories, learn from the setbacks, and use these insights to fuel the flame of your aspirations for the year to come.
With a roadmap forged from reflection and goals set with intention, step confidently into the blank pages of the new year. Embrace the unknown with open arms, knowing that each day offers an opportunity for growth, transformation, and the unwritten stories that will shape your narrative.
As the clock strikes midnight on the eve of the new year, let it resonate not just as the end of a chapter but as the prologue to a tale of purpose, resilience, and self-discovery. May the coming year be a canvas awaiting the masterpiece of your intentions.
If this is your year to step into your own discovery of who you are and what you’re meant for, schedule a complimentary consultation with me to see what support you might need in getting to where you want to be at this time next year. It all starts with you.
Happy New Year!
Michèle
